John Wall Will Ruin Your Chances of Getting Laid

John Wall is used to getting what he wants.

From being a five-star recruit coming out of high school to one-and-done at Kentucky, and becoming one of the highest-paid players in the NBA. But it’s off the court where Wall really scored.

Young Dice

After a turbulent couple of years following the death of his father due to liver cancer when he was only 9 years old, John Wall became a two-sport athlete in high school before his mom pushed him towards basketball.

It was a smart decision, that didn’t seem like one at the time.

John was 5 foot 8 and skinny as Snoop Dogg on a no-carb diet in his sophomore year of high school, but he grew to 6 foot 3 and the consensus top point guard in the country by the end of his senior year. “Dice” as John’s friends liked to call him, had a huge come-up.

In his senior year, John nearly averaged a 20-point triple-double while leading his school to the North Carolina Class 1A state championship game.

Predictably, this led to recruitment letters from all of the major D1 programs, who all wanted an oversized ball-handler with blazing-fast speed, who could also score at ease.

Kind of like a new millennium Magic Johnson, who Wall patterned his game after.

John eventually committed to Coach Cal and Kentucky where his legend would only grow, both on and off the court.

Hey, where my party at?

Once he got to Kentucky, it didn’t take John Wall long to pick up where he left off.

Only a handful of games into his only season at UK, Wall set the school single-game assist record with 16 and formed one of the most exciting duos in college basketball history alongside an equally agile 6 foot 10 center named DeMarcus Cousins.

Wall and Cuz built their chemistry off the court as well, becoming fast friends and State Street regulars.

According to one Reddit user who has since deleted their account, there was a party in November 2009 with a bunch of in-state people.

He noticed two tall kids walk in who towered above the rest of the partygoers.

One of them was John Wall, who went straight to the dance floor, approached two girls, whispered something in one of their ears – probably that he had a 3.4 GPA or something to that effect and off they went into the night. Most likely down to the library to study.

Another account chimed in on the same thread confirming OP’s post, saying Wall would walk into parties, ask “Who wants to throttle his eggplant” and leave with a pair of girls in tow in two minutes tops.

Area bars near the UK campus even had the John Wall shot which was blue curacao and vodka and the Big Cuz drink, which was just a taller version of the Wall shot.

This is pretty standard stuff for well-known college athletes, but apparently, Wall got around like 2pac

He even nearly had to be banned from one fraternity’s parties because he was ruining the chances of every other guy getting laid.

Given such tales, one can only imagine the dick wagon Wall pulled once he got to the pros.

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