Larry Joe Bird is a basketball god.
But even gods have off days and shoot bricks sometimes. In the worst game of his pro career, the namesake of this site was held scoreless for an entire game and frankly I am a better person today because of it.
The absolute savage and roundball savant known as Larry Legend has racked up more accolades than a hypochondriac has pills. For example, he once told a young Gary Payton:
Look here, man, I’m gonna shoot this mothafucking jumper in your face right there in that corner and it’s gonna be your Christmas present.
Larry Bird
He then proceeded to drain a J right in the Glove’s mug, wrapping and delivering said present🎁
This kind of bravado and skill takes a lifetime to build…unless you’re Larry Bird or maybe Chuck Norris.
Bird excelled at basketball from a young age, becoming his high school’s all-time leading scorer before averaging 30 PPG, 13 RBG, and 4 APG in college and winning the Naismith College Player of the Year award in 1979.
All of this before definitively proving that white men can jump in the pros long before Billy Hoyle ever graced the blacktop.
Bird Meets World B. Free
During the 1980-81 season, only his second in the association, Bird was already schooling fools.
Averaging better than 20 PPG, 10 RPG, and 5 APG, which he did in 5 different seasons. Unfortunately, these averages took a dip on January 2nd, 1981.
I don’t know if Larry drank other players under the table on new year’s or bludgeoned someone in a bar fight. But something was definitely off.
Of course, it could just have been the legend being thrown off by World B. Free’s Barnum & Bailey circus name. We’ll never know.
Whatever it was, the West Baden Indiana badass was shooting bricks.
The game against the mid-Warriors mercifully ended an 0-9 shooting display, with three turnovers in 37 minutes of playing time🧱
So Bad, It Was Good
Statistics show that we don’t learn more from personal failure than success.
But, I would argue that we do learn plenty from the personal failure of others.
At least I know I do.
So when a 6’9, 220-pound professional basketball player who shares a last name and looks with Big Bird performs poorly. I rejoice🙌
If someone at the very top of their chosen profession can on occasion suck so badly, then there is hope yet for all of us.
So the next time you bomb a presentation, fail a test in school, or your girlfriend cheats on you. Just remember Larry Bird’s worst game to get you through it.
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