The Story of How Ruben Patterson Became A Registered Sex Offender

A second-round draft pick who overcame enormous personal and professional odds, Ruben Patterson had a promising NBA career in front of him until he joined the Seattle SuperSonics and an incident changed everything.

This is the story of how Ruben Patterson became a registered sex offender.

Trouble Was a Constant

If you play high school basketball, your chances of getting drafted to the NBA are around 0.012%.

These are the odds Ruben Patterson from Cleveland, Ohio beat.

LeBron’s line about “nothing being given and everything being earned” in Northeast Ohio definitely applies to a young Patterson and his family.

A lot of athletes and even yours truly grew up po’, but Ruben’s adolescence saw his mom struggle with drug addiction, his pops locked up, and one of his sisters take to abusing drugs as well. Tough.

Despite this less-than-ideal upbringing, Ruben was a hefty youngster who excelled at sports and this would prove to be his ticket out.

Still, even when Ruben thought he had made it and got drafted with the 32nd overall pick in the 1998 NBA Draft, the season didn’t end up starting until February 1999 due to a lock-out and he had to play overseas in Greece for a couple months in order to make some bread.

Trouble seemed to follow him around like an obsessed groupie, which would be a constant theme throughout his life, as we’re about to see.

The Nanny

After starting his NBA career with the Lakers, which I don’t remember at all. I vividly recall Patterson signing with the Sonics the following season in 1999.

Playing alongside The Glove, and Vin Baker in his prime, Patterson had the best two years of his career, averaging nearly 13 ppg , shooting better than 50% from the field, and establishing a well-earned rep as a defensive stopper.

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However, Seattle proved to be a double-edged sword, as it was also the place where his life changed forever.

Ruben’s summer of sin started in June 2000, when he broke a man’s jaw outside of a Cleveland nightclub. Something he received a $1,000 dollar fine and a three-game suspension for. Slap on the wrist.

He wouldn’t be so lucky come September when he was accused of the worst offense known to man. No, not cockblocking another bro, but secs of the non-consensual kind.

The charge was leveled by his 24-year-old live-in nanny, who helped his Mrs. look after their two kids.

I Did Not Commit A Criminal Act

According to court papers, the incident went down like Patterson’s pants on the evening of September 25th.

The nanny was doing her usual rounds and checking on the kids, when she walked into Patterson’s bedroom to check in on his youngest and saw him laying on the bed buck naked.

Like some type of horny Nike spokesperson, the first words out of Patterson’s mouth were

Come on, let’s do it

Ruben allegedly grabbed her and she quote “broke free after performing an adult act” on Patterson.

The kicker is, this all happened while his wife was in the hospital no less, recovering from cosmetic surgery – whether it was a boob or booty job was not specified.

In the end, Patterson entered a plea to third-degree attempted rape and had to register as a sex offender, while maintaining that he did not commit a criminal act, just that he had cheated on his wife.

This would follow Patterson around for the rest of his life. Future teammates like Shawn Kemp would even troll him by posting naked pictures of centerfolds dressed as naughty nannies on his locker.

But don’t feel too bad for our guy, as he’s still found new and innovative ways to get in trouble, having most recently been charged in a healthcare fraud scheme alongside other ex-NBA players.

Like Tupac said, some things never change😥

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