Over the past decade and a half, Sacramento Kings fans have had it worse than a blind street beggar in Calcutta.
But for the first time, in a long time, there is a reason for hope and even premature celebration.
Here are 5 reasons kings fans ought to be banging their cowbells right now:
1. Never having to worry about the team moving to another city…like Anaheim, Seattle, or Virginia Beach, all of which almost happened. The Kings are Sacramento’s team, and they’re here to stay. So we can enjoy games with cowbells in tow without worrying about the team packing up and leaving town anytime soon.
2. Despite California going to absolute shit over the past three years, it is still always sunny in Sacramento. This means you can go to games in shorts year-round and have fewer layers of clothing to remove if you plan on streaking.
3. The best arena food in the NBA. You can quote me on this, especially those delicious Golden 1 Center nachos. There’s also a chance you’ll run into De’Aaron Fox grabbing some before a game too.
4. Slamson the Lion may be ranked among the league’s worst mascots. But he once helped arena workers clean up after a fan hurled on the court🤮 proving he’ll lend a helping paw when you are in need.
5. Jason Terry, who was infamously acquired before the 2014 trade deadline, but ended up scorning the Kings like a bitter ex is now an assistant coach with the Utah Jazz. A team that the Kings have absolutely owned on two separate occasions this season, helping push them down the standings and nearly out of a play-in spot.
The End of the Kangz Era
I may regret ever writing this post, but this season feels different. With half of it now over, the Kings look like a young and exciting team that might be just a piece away from seriously contending in the West.
The NBA record 16-year playoff drought is about to come to an end and who knows, maybe they’ll even surprise everyone and secure home court in the first round too.
All jokes aside, the Sacramento Kings have been in a perpetual rebuilding cycle since I was a horny teen. I am now a horny 30+-year-old man, but they have a talented young core that plays basketball the way it ought to be played, and the future looks as bright as that purple beam.
The Kangz are dead, long live the Kings!
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